Trans(ing) the Catholic High School
School Administrators Approve New Codes of Behavior/Dress
As noted in its inaugural post, the Crier—when necessary—would reach beyond NW Georgia in order to pen cultural commentary. Now is just such an occasion due to some strange dealings at St. Joseph’s High School, a Catholic school located in Renfrew, Ontario.
Recently, a student at the school—one Josh Alexander—was arrested and suspended for saying there were only two genders. In response, school officials have “rewritten” the school’s most important codes: Code of Behavior and Dress Code. The new codes are shown below.
Codes of Behaviour & Dress
“The Student Code of Behaviour has evolved over a number of years through input by students, parents, staff, parish and LGBTQ+ representatives. Its purpose is to create and maintain a positive and Christian learning environment in which each student can develop his/her/they full potential, and to assist the student in reaching his/her/they goals. The code has also been designed so Christianity can now approve of boy/boy sausage sucking, girl/girl taco eating, and all things TRANS.
Appropriate Standard of Dress and Grooming: You are expected to ensure that your dress, grooming and ornamentation reflect good taste and responsible attitudes at all times. School is your place of work and so it is expected that you will dress and groom yourself appropriately. Attire which is not consistent with expectations of a school-work environment or with the philosophy of a Catholic-Christian high school or with those TRANS may not be worn. This includes:
T-shirts with rude, vulgar or suggestive statements on them. You may, however, wear any LGBTQ+ t-shirts, t-shirts that say “Boys Ovulate” and “Boys Menstruate” and “Boys Have Periods” and “Boys Can Have Babies.”
Leggings are to be treated the same as miniskirts - the top or skirt must be a palm width from the knee. Trans Girls can wear leggings that show dick/penis heads through the stretchy material.
Leggings cannot be worn strictly as pants—except for Trans Girls who want to nance down the hallway while flopping their dicks/penises from side-to-side.
Miniskirts - skirts must reach within the wearer's palm width to the knees when standing. Trans Girls, however, can show some “under thong” if they desire. Hairy, exposed ball sacks are highly encouraged and inclusive.
Muscle shirts or tops which do not cover the midriff, low cut or backless. The undergarment of the student should not be visible. Trans Girls, however, are allowed to show bra straps and even nipple.
Halter tops, tube tops or tank tops. Shoulder tops must be covered. Trans Girls, however, may wear halter tops and tube tops.
Hats, caps, visors as well as other head coverings deemed inappropriate by the Principal or Vice Principal, may not be worn in the buildings. School Administrators approve of any and all LGBTQ+ head coverings, especially Drag wigs.
Ripped jeans are allowed as long as there is no skin showing above the knee. As an example, if there are rips above the knee, the student will either put a patch under the rips or wear leggings under the jeans. Trans Girls, however, will be allowed a hole for their dick/penis heads to pop-out.
Sunglasses, except where required for medical reasons. Any LGBTQ+ person can wear glasses if it’s deemed fashionable by School Administrators.
Short shorts - shorts cannot be shorter than the wearer's palm width from the knee. Trans Girls, however, are allowed to wear booty shorts.
Jewelry, facial decorations, hairstyles and tattoos, which in the opinion of the Principal or Vice Principal call undue attention to the wearer or which are distracting or inappropriate in a workplace or Catholic-Christian high school, may not be worn—with all LGBTQ+ adornment the exception.
Any clothing which in the judgement of the Principal or Vice Principal is in poor taste or not suitable in the context of the school. School Administrators approve all clothing that supports “Man Dick in Man Ass,” “Pussy on Pussy,” and all TRANS contexts.
Physical Education Dress: A school approved physical education uniform must be worn for P.E. classes. Students who come inappropriately dressed for Physical Education class cannot participate and, therefore, will be marked Absent. Non-marking soles are required on gym shoes. Trans Girls, however, are encouraged to wear stilettos on the gym floor.
Inappropriate Displays of Affection: In the context of the school, kissing, holding hands and romantic hugging are inappropriate, except for boy/boy ass fucking, girl/girl pussy licking, and Trans Girls ogling biological girls in bathrooms and locker rooms.
Skateboards and Roller-Blades: Because of the safety considerations, the use of skateboards and roller blades is not permitted on school property. BDSM apparatuses are approved, however.
Snowballs: The Lord made the snow to fall on the ground. Please leave it there as the chance of injury to other students is a concern. Since the Lord didn’t make biology, Trans Girls can do literally whatever they want to do—no rules for them. They are especially encouraged to stand in female bathrooms/locker rooms and ogle that pussy.
Gum Chewing/Chewing Tobacco/Spitting/Swallowing: Gum chewing is not permitted during classes. The use of chewing tobacco is prohibited at all times on campus. Spitting is highly inappropriate behaviour and is not tolerated. But, you are allowed to swallow. If you want to perform oral sex and swallow—such actions are deemed appropriate, especially for Trans Girls wanting to suck that dick between classes; please use designated corners and closets for all dick sucking and sperm swallowing.”
School Administrators have submitted these new codes to the Canadian Human Rights Tribunal, which unanimously approved them. Prime Minister Justin “Tuck It” Trudeau also voiced his approval for these new codes of conduct.